never ever...

The nasty winter cloud has worked it way up from the southern states and it is bitterly cold here.  An early winter with the icy winds that make your eyes water and lips sting....making you curse the season change even though all during Summer you declared how much you just wished it would be Winter already.  Seasons are so dramatic in our little corner of the country....the 'melt-me' kind of summer days to the 'never-leaving-my-bed-EVER' kind of winter nights. 

Where we dig deep into our cupboards for our beanies & trackie-daks so we can still go for adventures outside....the kind of adventures that Macie craves and I secretly enjoy.  It gets me away from the constant pull of the laptop and sewing machine and it satisfies Macie's adventurous streak....and saves our cottage from being made a war zone.  It is outside where her mind goes wandering and sets her little legs moving....all while I just quietly follow her and top-up my heart with her youth and my photo fix.  

I never imagined to be raising my children on a farm.  That I would eventually marvel in the beauty of the land like my husband did as a child.  Or that Macie would see the land through the eyes of her Daddy - a big playground with hidden treasures wherever her imagination leads her.  How I would see the benefits of letting our children roam, explore, imagine and get dirty.  No fences, no boundaries - just the wide open spaces with the sorghum crop serving as a temporary barrier.

Never did I imagine that instead of having a puppy as a pet - Macie would have 11 chooks, Bruce the Rooster and "Olivia" the pig to call her own.  That she would walk around the yard while having her 'Ladies' affectionately follow her and that she would get right down to eye-level to speak with them....as if she is the "Chook Whisperer".  That she would recite the cartoon-like-Olivia song over and over while walking over to say "Hello" to her little piglet - in that high-pitched tone - the very tone that makes even the hardest and strongest of men drop to their knees and join in on her antics.

That we would collect rocks, admire sunsets, walk along dirt roads and cringe at the sight of a snake track.  That she would learn to clap her hands to scare the naughty Galahs off the crop and then if that doesn't work, without hesitation she would walk up to them to ensure they flew away....and then walk back to me with a smile on her face....that satisfaction smile....the one that makes her eyes sparkle and says "I did it Mummy!".

That she would love to sit on the farm mule (imagine a golf-cart) and pretend to drive with one hand on the steering wheel with the other hand on the UHF radio hand-piece - all while getting annoyed that no-one is answering her calls....Hello?  Helllloooo?  It's these moments that I never imagined....but the very moments that leave me smiling and crooning over the little girl that has stolen my very heart.

But most of all, that together we would search for and pick wild flowers and pretend how pretty they smelt.  That she would be so excited to find this burst of colour in between the drying winter grass....as if she had found her treasure...and how I would marvel that my very on daughter teaches me daily lessons.  Today's lesson being 'Stop, Slow Down and Smell the Roses'....

She fills my heart, 
She fills my soul, 
All without realising.....
never ever did I imagine that.  X