Today is Macie's "school" day. Each Friday she wakes up and literally screams "I'M GOOOOING TO DAYCARE TOOOODAY!" and then proceeds to sit at the window and wait for her Ma to come and pick her up (a little Dalli Cottage tradition for Macie & her Ma to share).
I usually relish in the joy of having a day to spend some quality time with William but today I felt all emotional. Every single day my little girl is growing up. She is funny, intelligent, stubborn, cheeky, sometimes naughty and she is growing up.
The last few weeks have been like a rollercoaster with my girl. Tantrums are in full swing and can erupt at any given time. The threat of crocodiles coming to bite off her toes while crying are wearing thin and to top it all off - I accidently scratched her face on Monday and now she declares - very loud and very clearly may I add - that "Mummy scratched my face" while I die of embarrassment in the corner and recite my "I promise it was an accident - and look - I cut my fingernails all off now!" speech! If that wasn't enough, I had to go into battle with Australian Hearing regarding her delays with testing due to their short-staffing issues....and with that always brings up a tsunami of emotions for me. My mum likens me to a Lioness protecting her cub.....and it's true - I am woman, hear me roar!
Next year will be my last 'full' year with her before she toddles off to Kindy and that kinda makes me sad. I am notorious for wishing away the time - but today, time just slapped me in the face as I watched her hand-in-hand with her Ma, smiling and confidently walking off to daycare - with not a worry in the world.
I know that in a blink of an eye - she will a schoolgirl, a teenager, a woman, a wife, a mother.
And I now know why on Monday (my birthday), my mum said to me "How did my baby become a woman that is now twenty-seven years old?".....just like she says to me every.single.year.
I used to roll my eyes every single year when she said this to me - but this year, I understood the question. Time rolls on so quickly. We get caught up in the mundane - the life that makes the days go quickly, and the weeks disappear and before we know it - the words "Where did that year go" come flying out of our mouths.
As much as I wish the time away - today, I just wanted to press pause. I wanted to kiss her delicious cheeks just one more time and tell her I loved her with more passion - so she never ever has a doubt that her Mummy will always be there for her.
Sometimes I want to press rewind to fix the things I have done wrong or the things that I would have done differently.
And sometimes I want to press fast-forward - in hope that our relationship is still forged on love, respect and friendship.
But instead of wishing - I am going to ensure that I am always living in the moment. Enjoying my delightful babies for as long as I can. Reminding myself that my messy house will always be there and that the e-mails that need replying can wait until my babies are tucked safely into bed.
I am going to live now. Before it's too late.